Jade's Blog

Monday, 6 April 2009

The Rain Inspires Deep Thoughts.
Topic: Life
Warning: The content and subject matter is of a sexual nature. Adult discretion is advised.

About a week or so ago, I posted a video by 'Jesusophile' entitled "Why Atheist Arguments Don't Work" and my response to it. For those unfamiliar with this individual, below is a link to his YouTube video channel, in case you need a frame of reference.
https://www.youtube.com/user/jesusophile

There has been a sort of video blog war between Atheists and Christians for sometime now on YouTube, arguing creation vs. evolution, the bible vs. human behavior and the list literally goes on and on. I often have the misfortune of tripping across these videos, as I frequently search the YouTube category 'Nonprofits & Activism' for the latest information regarding animal rights, the environment, and related issues. Since there is no 'Religion & Spirituality' category on YouTube, individuals espousing either religious or anti-religious opinions regularly post in the afore mentioned category. This is how I discovered my first video blog of 'Jesusophile'.

I have spent some time, probably too much time to be honest, trying to discern if this young man sincerely believes in the opinions he publicizes, if his opinions are merely satire of the social absurdity, or if he is a "troll" (someone who knowingly creates controversy to generate activity on his website/channel -or- to derive entertainment from comments (video or other) from viewers who object to same said controversy).

There are valid reasons for my confusion. One example of this is that his videos are not listed in the 'Comedy' category on YouTube, but rather a section associated with activism. If the subject matter of his videos are intended as a form of comedy or satire, then why wouldn't the videos be posted to an area reserved for humor?

Another example, is the fact that he provides no disclaimer that the material in his videos are intended as satire either in the video itself, the description, or the tags. This type of warning is common for most satirists so that their material is not misinterpreted or misconstrued as actual opinion.

If you take the previous examples into account you are left with the choices that he either truly believes his opinions, or he is a troll.

Given that the videos he lists as his favorites are mostly those that have expressed passionate disagreement with his opinions, it is far easier to conclude that Jesusophile is nothing more than a troll. This may seem harmless on the surface, but can potentially reap hazardous results.

When you consider the struggle that the gay community as a whole has in being accepted as equal members of our often intolerant society, the self identity struggles of women and the roles expected of them, and the silent confusion and shame that puberty suffers upon teens discovering their bodies for the first time, the unconscionable ideas that Jesusophile espouses publicly are hurtful and demeaning to what ought to be a civilized, socially and intellectually evolved society, in my opinion.

Whether satire or fast held personal belief, it is irresponsible to broadcast to an audience of teen - adult, possibly younger, that, "Anal sex is wrong ... pain is a sign from God in saying, Hey, gay people, stop doing that.", "Sex is not something that is supposed to be pleasurable for the female, it is primarily something the man will enjoy ... the woman was created for the man's pleasure.", or "Men shouldn't do that sort of thing [masturbate] ... because that's wasted sperm ... that's potential civilizations flushed down the toilet." (These are quotes directly from one of his videos posted on YouTube entitled "Why it is okay for sex to hurt...").

These uneducated and intolerant statements, which are devoid of any trace of humor aside from perhaps inane stupidity, are dangerous in their potential to motivate prejudice within impressionable minds. It sends a message, in my opinion, that hate mongering and bigotry is funny or an acceptable behavior to endeavor in, and exploits the fear motivated contempt that already exists within the narrow-minded who share similar, if not identical, beliefs.

I don't deny Jesusophile the right to say whatever he wishes, no matter what the motivation... or the lack thereof. However, I strongly disagree with the content of his videos, satire or no. They are insensitive, divisive, injurious, and reckless.

My opinion is my own self proclamation of free speech.

By the way? WAY TO GO IOWA!!! (The Meaning of Iowa's Gay-Marriage Decision).

Brightest blessings.

Posted by spiritiger at 9:17 AM
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Wednesday, 25 March 2009

PSG Confirmation!
Topic: Life
Our PSG confirmation arrived in our email today! Now, if I can just remember to bring my ID this year when checking in at the gate I'm all set
(( laughs )).

I can't wait to see everyone again!

Posted by spiritiger at 2:39 PM
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Tuesday, 24 March 2009

The Day After.
Topic: Life
Well, it's the day after I found out about my Aunt's death and though I am not exactly 100% yet, I do feel a little better.

I have the blessings of having a wonderful partner, son, and very caring friends. To Scotty and Caitlin, thank you.

When Ken got off from work last night he was sweet enough to bring home a sack full of "comfort food". I guess everyone has their guilty pleasure. For some its ice cream, others cake, for me... well it's chicken mcnuggets.

Today has been an odd day for me. Not good, not bad, just sort of full of contemplative thoughts that are jumbling around in my brain. I guess, I'm just trying to make sense of it all, if there is any. Let me see if I can explain...

You see, before my Aunt passed away, I had been trying to balance the scale on a separate though similar situation and dealing with it the way I always seem to deal with things; silently, in my heart and head, but not so much out in the open.

About a year ago, more or less, a former friend of mine had been diagnosed with treatable Lung Cancer. She was considered very lucky at the time because it was discovered early. However, and I don't know the medical technicalities although I do know it is rare, the cancer moved to her brain and formed a tumor. She wasn't given a good prognosis. Surgery was scheduled, but the chance of success is minimal. As I am writing this she is lying in a hospital with a 50/50 chance of surviving. She is a few years younger than I am and has four children.

I have had mixed feelings about it. Don't get me wrong, I believe it to be a sad and terrible situation and my heart goes out to her, her present husband and her children, two of which used to be playmates of my son. Though our friendship ended on rocky terms, I have never and still don't wish her ill will. My confusion has been more about how involved I should be in all of it and now with the death of my Aunt it just seems to be magnified.

I won't go into specifics, as it was many many years ago and the history isn't relevant anymore. Save to say we had a disagreement about something, in retrospect, that was very insignificant but at the time seemed an important drama. Neither one of us ever picked up the phone to talk to the other about it. Two or three years passed, and her mother (whom I was also close to) died. I went to the funeral to pay my respects to the family, she and I talked, dealt with it briefly in a kind of "I'm okay, you're okay" way and tried to be friends. But it just didn't work. She and I were just too different and after the years that we hadn't communicated we seemed even more so. We just quietly and without anger went our separate ways.

It was difficult, as her husband was a good friend of mine but there was no sense in she and I pretending that the friendship was still there.

So fast forward a bit. She and her husband divorced and she remarried a person that was in mine and Ken's former group of friends. Her husband and I caught up with each other and I, whether I liked it or not, got first hand information about how ugly the aftermath of the divorce had gotten. Always aware that the truth is somewhere in the middle, I avoided taking any sides. However, I would be lying if I said that what I was hearing left anything but a poor impression of my former friend. It's strange how no matter how far apart you make yourself from the people in your past, you still find yourself in the circle of information nonetheless.

Okay, so now that I have blathered on, my only real problem (if it can really be called that) I had with my former friend (and her sisters) involves her mother, whom I also considered a friend. Every Memorial Day, I visit her mother's grave to place yellow roses (her favorite), clean her plaque, and talk to her. I'm the only one who visits her grave. The reason I know this, is from talking to the caretaker after the bronze vase from her plaque disappeared.

Now, I'm not angry at her or her two sisters for not visiting their mother's grave. Without going into details, I know all too well the history there and they have more than anyone a right to their choices. I guess, I had hoped the years of getting older and being a mother herself and knowing just how hard that can be sometimes would have softened her more. I don't hold it against her or her sisters, however.

So, getting away from the tangent and getting back to my confusion over the situation. I guess I've felt that going to her now, given that we aren't friends anymore, would be hypocritical and more than a little unfair to her. I had no inclination to get in touch with her and renew our friendship before any of this happened, so to do so now just seems disingenuous. I do care, very much. It would be impossible, given our history, not to. Perhaps that's why there is always that little voice of doubt in my head that asks "Are you doing the right thing?".

Something I have learned the hard way is that second thoughts are too late in coming when someone dies.

Either way, given recent events, I don't think I'm in any frame of mind to make any right decisions. Everything is still too fresh and no less complex in my mind. I just hope clarity returns soon, these chaotic thoughts are just too much right now.

I just hope that her surgery was a success and that she can recover completely and return to her husband and children. May the Gods and Goddesses give them all strength.

Brightest blessings.

Posted by spiritiger at 4:08 PM
Updated: Tuesday, 27 October 2009 5:26 PM
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Monday, 23 March 2009

Dealing With Death
Topic: Life
I believe it is a mockery to say that all women have a corner in the market of being able to openly talk about their feelings. At the very least, it is untrue in my case. When it comes to grief, I have never been good at participating in an open dialogue about it, and I absolutely dispise crying in front of other people be they strangers or close friends.

I have just found out that my Aunt Carol, who after years of battling cancer, has finally passed away. She was a funny, vivacious woman who never seemed capable of not smiling, and I admired her a great deal. She was the kind of woman that never seemed to show her age, and always to me seemed younger than her years could ever prove. She was the kind of adult that when I was a teenager, I didn't mind hanging out with.

But, I am not a teenager anymore. I'm 41 with a teenager of my own and now find myself tackling the emotions of anger and feelings of loss that, unfortunately, always accompanies grief.

Death. We fear it, we fear it will take the ones we love most, yet it is an inarguable inevitability. We fear talking about it, that somehow the discussion alone might make others view us as morose or morbid.

Take for example our fascination, as a culture, with vampires. We romanticize the idea of them, because they have immortality. Death never claims them. Forever young, they conquer time and history to take one lover after the other, like some dark fairytale. But life is rarely a fairytale. If anything it is a short story with a predictable end.

Yes, I know I am rambling. But, as I stated, I have never been good at talking about my "feelings".

Even though I have known for a while now that my Aunt was dying, like many people I didn't really prepare myself for it. You can say over and over in your head that someone is dying and hope your heart will listen, but it rarely seems to really sink in. It's as if somewhere deep down there is that silent glimmer of hope in your soul that says "Maybe they can beat it". So when death comes after even a long battle with disease, you're still as shocked as you would have been had it just come out of the blue.

Memories deceive you as well into thinking death is impossible. Every time I would think of my Aunt I would see the woman I remembered her to be. A beautiful, sandy brown haired woman with laughing brown eyes. Always smiling, always warm, and seemingly always happy. So when she got sick, I could never envision her as such. My parents would give me news of her condition and in my mind, Aunt Carol would appear exactly as my memory preserved her to be. Not the bald, shriveled and sick woman she was. Even now my mind completely rejects that image. It's not what I want to remember. I want to remember what she once was.

Beneath it all, is anger... no rage that this wonderful woman is gone. It is too soon for her to be gone from this world. She was the youngest sibling in my dad's family. No, she wasn't young, but she is too young to be dead. Before the cancer, she was a very active and very healthy person. She could have lived as long a life as my great grandmother who died when she was in her mid nineties if weren't for that wretched disease. I mean, I'm 41 and my grandmother, her mother, is still alive!

I mean, its just impossible for me to balance in my head how a generous and loving mother like her could be taken away so soon and yet this monster Josef Fritzl, well into his seventies who imprisoned his own daughter in a dungeon, raped her repeatedly over the span of twenty-four years and sired seven children with her, nature allows to survive?! How on earth does that make any sense?!

You've heard all the experts talk about the randomness of tornadoes, right? That it will hit one house, skip three or four before hitting another house? That's how I see Cancer. It will skip the three pack a day smoker who eats nothing but fast food and yet hits the next person who jogs three miles a day, eats all their veggies, and has never smoked or drank a day in their life.

I will give you an example of this. When I was in high school, the father of one my former boyfriends died after a short battle with Colon Cancer. The man had never smoked or used tobacco products of any kind, he had never drank alcohol a single day of his life, he jogged everyday and ate healthy.... avoided fast or fatty foods. Yet at 42 was diagnosed with Colon Cancer. He died in less than a year of that diagnosis.

My great grandmother who died in her nineties, drank whiskey every morning, ever afternoon, and every evening of her life and never had any serious medical problems until her death of natural causes.

It just doesn't fit into my head. But then these sort of things never do, and are probably not supposed to.

No, I haven't really cried yet, not to say tears haven't been shed... they just seem few and sporadic to me right now. They're more like brief quiet expressions than an uncontrolled heaving outcry. The only reason I think I've allowed them at all is that I am in a room by myself with only the company of my laptop. If I there were another person in the room with me, I'm not sure they would come at all. I wish I could explain why I am that way, but the reasons seem locked away even from me.

I still need to call my mom, who is at the moment on her way with my father to Delaware... and I don't really want to at all. Don't get me wrong, I love my parents very much. But, we've never been the kind of family that openly expresses grief very well. We tend to talk about details like; where the funeral is going to be, what cemetery she's going to be buried in, the cost of the casket and so on, not how we are actually feeling. I'm just not up to the "polite game" yet. Which is probably why I am unloading all of it here in my blog first.

Anyway, for those who actually read this... I am not completely crazy, just a bit unbalanced on the wire at the moment and I thank you for caring enough to read it.

Brightest blessings.

Posted by spiritiger at 3:59 PM
Updated: Tuesday, 27 October 2009 5:24 PM
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Friday, 20 March 2009

A Beautiful Day and an Update.
Topic: Life
The sun is shining brightly today and it has been beautiful here in Southwestern Indiana the last couple of days. It is a bit cooler today, but in general the weather has been too nice to have been cooped up indoors so I haven't been at my computer much.

As an update to my well being, I am happy to say that I am over my bout with the flu that had me in bed with 102 degree temperature for a couple of days last week. I still have a slight cough, but nothing serious and it is going away day to day.

My cat, Hemingway, has been enjoying the birds return to our carport, chattering away as he watches them rebuild their nests. But what is a thrill to him, is not so much to me as this means that they will be soon, once again, be decorating our vehicles with shades of white and purple.

Seeing as the Pagan Spirit Gathering is approaching in June, Ken and I have been busy in our spare time doing much needed shopping. Last night, we went to Dick's Sporting Goods and purchased an Easy-Up canopy for my son's tent (Got a heck of a deal on it too, as they were on sale). I would still like to buy my son a new tent, a table for us to eat on in camp, something more sturdy to put our stove and oven on, and a "kitchen tent" which Ken has been reluctant about getting since we first started attending P.S.G. We will, of course, be bringing plenty of Mead.

Something a bit odd... when I got on my profile page today I noticed that the myspace music widget had been mysteriously added to it even though I had not changed my settings to 'unhide' it. Hmmm... strange. Anyway, when I logged in today, I corrected the error and removed it from appearing on my page. If anyone reading this is interested in what music I like or I am listening to, there is a link provided on my profile marked 'My Playlist (Click to Listen)' on the right hand side of the page. It is a safe link to my profile on Gaia Online where my 'Project Playlist' widget is located. I think the list is about 40+ songs or so long. I add to it periodically, so you can check back for anything new if you are so inclined.

(( shrugs )) Anyway, that's it for today on 'What's new with Jade'. I hope everyone is enjoying being on the threshold of Spring and all the beauty that is soon to return to all of us.

Brightest blessings.

Posted by spiritiger at 2:33 PM
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Tuesday, 10 March 2009

*Happy Snoopy Dance* I got my PSG brochure!
Topic: Life
It came! It came! A beautiful full color brochure, all golden and pretty with a chubby faced sun! It came! Which means my registration, Ken's registration and Tommy's registration will be on its way to the good people of Circle by tomorrow morning! *Big toothy grin

and butt dance on the bed for good measure!*

I am looking at the pictures right now of Camp Zoe, just gorgeous! The water looks so serene and calm. I can't wait until we are on the road in June so that we get to see more of its beauty!

*Reads the section about Camp Zoe Facilities*

Shower house with HOT showers!! Woot!! Is such a thing really possible? *giggles*

Firespinning? Yay!! Tommy will be thrilled to hear that.

Now I have even MORE reasons to get over this nasty flu (you know, aside from being annoyed from my own recent over blogging? *thpppt*)

Its amazing how something so simple as a brochure conjures up memories of drum rhythms, the smell of bonfires, beautiful spirits dancing, all the laughter and smiles I remember so warmly. *squeals* I can't wait!! Just a little over three months!!

No more blogging, I gots stuff to plan!!

Posted by spiritiger at 6:08 PM
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Monday, 9 March 2009

Final thoughts about Wisteria, then no more.
Topic: Life
Since the ugliness began several months ago over the announcement that the Pagan Spirit Gathering would no longer be held at Wisteria during the Summer Solstice, I have remained relatively quiet about the situation (some might even say uncharacteristically quiet). But now, I feel I must have a say in order to finally put all the negativity and pain behind me and move on to Camp Zoe with a heart and a soul that is ready to celebrate with my Pagan brothers and sisters. A cleansing, as it were.

I think that some people have the delusion that Pagans are nothing more than harmless happy shiny hippies who just like to frolic naked around bonfires deep in the woods. The truth is that being a Pagan is far more complex and has a variety of different meanings depending on who you talk to. I call myself a Wittan (Weedan) far more often than I call myself a 'Pagan' but I embrace both because I am both.

I believe that most Pagans are of what I call a "tribal" mind, meaning that though we may not all follow identical religiosity we embrace one another in our belief that nature is sacred. It is nature itself that binds us to one another in a very real sense of brotherhood and sisterhood. If one of us hurts than all of us hurt.

That being said, however, I also realize that above our individual spirituality and our individual aspirations that sometimes the mundane weaknesses of being human often get in the way of things. Spite and jealousy to name only a few.

In truth, I don't know how all this unfortunate business got started although I think its clear by all accounts that trouble had been brewing for some time between Circle and Wisteria. I remember remarking to my friend Pele this past gathering that there was something wrong, I could just feel it. Everything was out of balance. He too felt it as I did. I don't think either one of us could even fathom how out of balance things really were.

Within just a few short months came the announcement, the Pagan Spirit Gathering would no longer be held at Wisteria. As if this news wasn't difficult enough to absorb, there was this adolescent attitude of the Wisterians, a sort of "Nyah! Nyah! Nyah!" in the face of those of us that had to pay a pretty penny for the past five years so they could have that nice new stage for their outdoor concert area (instead of much needed shower and toilet facilities)... but, I digress.

I've done a great deal of soul searching over the past several months since this announcement was made in October. About where I stand, about loyalty and about kinship and I believe I am finally standing on more solid ground... or as solid as it can be for an air sign with strong influences of fire (okay, Pagans will get this bit of humor :P)

Yes, Wisteria was beautiful. But the reason it was beautiful was because of the color and vitality we gave to the land... not the other way around. It came from the rhythms of our drums, the songs in our voices, every embrace we gave to one another with unselfish desire, and every ounce of love we feel for one another even after the solstice fades. The magic is in the land because we make it.

This celebration, the Pagan Spirit Gathering, is more than just a welcoming of the Summer Solstice. It's a family reunion. A chance for those of us who are apart for a year to return to one another, to share laughter, tears, and bask in the blessings of having one another as part of our lives.

If the Wisterians could not see how important this event was to those of us who embrace our tribe so lovingly then we never belonged there to start with. I finally see that now.

So, this June 2009, I will attend the Pagan Spirit Gathering with new ground beneath my feet but the same sky above me among the same people whom I have loved what seems like a lifetime; Scotty, Pele, Jase, Luno, Erick, Monica, Utu, Dawn, Caitlin, Paul, Dan, and Tereesa. There would be no 'Spirit' in the Gathering for me without these very special people.

One final word about Wisteria and the Wisterians and then I will not speak of either again. Nevermind the titles we as individuals cling to; Pagan, Wiccan, Druid, Enviromentalist, Naturist, lets shed those for just a moment and get down to the bare basic... Human. As human beings saddled with the same weaknesses and foibles as we all share. What joy, even in the short term, can there be in kicking a fellow human being when they are down? From my point of view those of us who are supporters of Circle were treated with complete contempt and disregard by some of the Wisterians. The slew of taunting and snotty postings on Circle associated lists by a select number of Wisterians in response to the initial reaction of the announcement of the dissolvement was then and now, to me, unforgivable. I guess you could say that I'm a soft gooey Pagan on the outside, but still hard jaw-breaking Irish in the center. Wisterians? As my Grandpa used to say "Be careful what bridges you burn, you can't climb over ashes." Because, though the cries have hushed and we are all moving forward, the damage has been done and cannot be undone. To you and your land I bid thee farewell now and forever with no regret.

Now, back to my wooziness and fighting off this flu that has me bed ridden. But hey, at least I'm on a brand new mattress. So every cloud does have a soft pillowy silver lining :)

Brightest Blessings.

Posted by spiritiger at 12:09 PM
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Friday, 30 January 2009

Surviving the Storm of the Century.
Topic: Life
Many of you may know if you've seen the national news that the midwest has been invaded by dangerous ice and snow, the likes I haven't seen since I was a small child.

The power here went out early Wednesday morning (about 2 am) and just got restored in my home at around midnight yesterday... though I wasn't here to celebrate the event, since I was holed up at the home of my vacationing parents (who, before they left, had shut off their water in order to save on bills while they were away).

It was the WORST birthday ever in my 41 years.

Ken, myself and Tommy managed to slowly make our way completely across town (West to East). Our first stop was my Aunt's apartment to get the key to my parent's house. Only when we arrived we learned the rather unfortunate news that the key was locked in her car which was completely coated with about an inch and a half sheet of ice and six inches of snow. So, while the manly men went to the task of chiseling their way to get into the code locked door, I grabbed a desperately needed shower (my son managed to get the last one at my house with the last of the hot water).

Now, my mother and her sister are very close. When I had complained to my mother on the phone about how these things always happen when you are the least prepared for them and how difficult things were going to be since I was broke until Friday, I should have predicted she would inform my Aunt of this... but the day had been so troublesome, that I just wasn't thinking clearly. So, after I stepped out of the shower, my Aunt was, of course, there with $100 and insisting that I accept the money. I relented reluctantly and accepted only $60 since I knew that there was no food accept for some dry and canned goods at their house. It would have been only $50 had the sum not been in only $20 increments.

After Ken and Tommy managed to retrieve the well preserved key, we made our way to Ken's parent's house (which is still without power as I write this). His dad, who is a Polio survivor, was home by himself at the time and with his circulation in his legs being so bad we were both worried about how he was enduring the cold. He's a very tough and independent man, but over the years it's gotten increasingly difficult for him to get around and a lot of the things he uses to make that endeavor easier either run on electricity or require a rechargeable battery which meant that he would be entirely dependent on his crutches to get around.

Ken retrieved his "Mr. Heater" from the garage which is kerosene powered so that they could periodically run it in the house to keep at least some heat circulating inside. I was still worried for his parents though, I will admit that I don't at all like kerosene heaters. You have to be very vigilant when running them indoors as they can cause Carbon Monoxide poisoning or if tipped over can start a fire. I told him that he and his wife were welcome to come with us and stay the night at my parent's house, but he wanted to be in his own home in his own bed and I can hardly blame him.

Ken's mother brought us dinner from Wendy's, and even though the hamburgers and french fries were stone cold by the time she got them home, the chili was still hot and after the day we had all had it seemed like the best meal ever.

At around 7 pm we left there and finally made our way into the next county to my parent's house. Now, no running water means no running toilets, but we seemed to have a plan to deal with that. We had a milk jug filled with water and a large sealed pitcher of water (so, roughly about 2 gallons) and my parents had left a large tub filled about one thirds full of water so that my Aunt could water the plants while they were away. So, we saved one gallon of purified water for cooking (or more importantly to make coffee with), and the other gallon and the remainder of the water in the tub we used to fill up the back of the toilet so that it could be flushed periodically and could still be used. We then filled the tub with snow and microwaved the snow packed pitcher when needed to keep the toilet filled. A fun birthday, right?

Well, anyway, Ken and Tommy decided to run to the convenience store down the road and get a couple of liters of soda for themselves since there wasn't much to drink at the house and I declined to come along as by this time I was completely and utterly exhausted. I got into my pajamas, stretched out on the couch, turned on the TV and was out like a light. I awoke about an hour later to Ken and Tommy singing "Happy Birthday To You" and handing me a clear container with a round red velvet cake with cream cheese icing (I know, but it's a southern thing and my favorite).

We all had cake, talked about the day while watching "Parking Wars" on TV and then went to bed. Which turned out to be another adventure, for me anyway. I don't know how many people reading this have ever slept in their parents beds as adults, but for me it just seemed... well, creepy. It didn't help matters that there was a professional photograph of them on the dresser looking on as we both drew down the covers and climbed into bed (nor earlier as I got dressed into my pajamas).

I slept miserably, tossing and turning most of the night as I tried to get comfortable on their double pillowed topped mattress. It's just too squishy for me. At around 4:45 am, I finally gave up and got up, made some coffee and enjoyed a breakfast of half a stack of Fat Free Ritz Crackers. Nummy...

At around 5 am I turned on the local news and learned that over 56,000 people in my city were still without power (down from 64,000), every motel and hotel were completely booked and shelters were overflowing. In Henderson Kentucky, the city that neighbors us to the south, 75% of the city was without power. Trees, laden with ice swollen branches were sagging and breaking all over the city snapping power lines or pressing down on them and stretching them nearly beyond capacity causing risk of electrocution since they are such wonderful conductors which makes many roads around here dangerous to navigate. Our city, and most of Kentucky are under a State of Emergency. Vectren, our local power company is saying that in some areas, and in cases of individual power outtages, it could be weeks before they can restore power. Which has me very worried about our independent living elderly.

I found out at around 8 am that power had been restored at my house, which I had mixed feelings about. On the one hand I was happy that I could return home and to the comforts I was accostumed to, but on another hand felt guilty about so many other people were still out there struggling to survive without power. I got the men up, and after getting themselves ready they set to the task of clearing the walkway and the driveway of my parent's house (we felt it was the least we could do since they had provided shelter for us for the night). It took about three hours due to the three inches of firmly packed ice underneath the snow. longer than we anticipated or could really afford since we still had to dig out his parent's van because they needed to drive to Indianapolis so that his mom could have surgury the next day. She had recently had a cornea transplant and her body has been rejecting it. So after we grabbed lunch at Burger King on the way, we finally made it to their house and at around 2 pm we managed to finally get both vans ice free and moving.

By the time we finally made it back to our house, I was wiped out. The tasks of clearing out snow and ice and dodging downed ice coated trees and branches arched over the roads had just competely taken it out of me. I took a nap for a couple of hours and at around 8pm, Ken woke me up determined to feed me. Neither one of us felt like doing much of anything so he had made a trip to our favorite Chinese resteraunt and brought home sesame chicken and soon after my belly was full, I fell right back asleep... which was not a good thing, because here I am awake since nearly 2 am and it's close to 5 am now. But then, I'm used to nearly constantly having my days and nights messed up.

I guess that's all for now. I'm not sure how long its going to be before everything is going to be 100% here locally. There are no heaters or generators to be bought anywhere in the city. There are thousands still without power, many stranded away from home having to share food and shelter with strangers in silmilar plights. My only hope at this point is that we have no casualties due to the ice or the lack of electricity in the surrounding areas.

Posted by spiritiger at 5:28 AM
Updated: Tuesday, 27 October 2009 4:30 PM
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Monday, 1 September 2008

My first 'MySpace' blog entry.
Topic: Life

Well, here is my first 'MySpace' blog entry. Not much to tell really. If you've read my profile you already know the basics. I had to list my religion as "other" since there was no listing for "Pagan", specifically Celtic Witta (pronounced: wee-dah). Wicca is not an all encompassing category for Paganism or "non-Christian".

I have a fairly ordinary life. Non-working Mom that spends WAY too much time MMORPGing. I have a man that I love almost more than life itself, his name is Ken and we've known each other for over 20 years.

Every year my family, Ken and my son Tommy, spend a week in rural Ohio at an event known as "The Pagan Spirit Gathering", hosted by Circle Sanctuary. Where we escape from Mundania and get to visit and catch up with our Pagan and Heathen friends... some of which are listed in my 'My Friends' category.

Anyway, that's pretty much all I have to write at the moment. Can't promise there will be anymore blogs from me as I tend to be the typical air sign and lose interest lol.

Brightest blessings

Jade

Posted by spiritiger at 10:45 PM
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Saturday, 9 August 2008

Spiritiger
Topic: Life

Since part of my name is 'Spiritiger' (chosen for my animal spirit totem), I've decided to do a little research today and I've come up with some very interesting information. If you know me personally, see how close these tidbits are..

(According to http://animalspirits.ladyinblack.com/tiger_spirit.htm)

The tiger is a solitary spirit, protecting its territory and coming together to mate and raise their young. In this aspect, you are a person who needs plenty of "space". You can feel suffocated easily by one who does not understand this. You are very loyal, loving and sensual, but must be with someone who really understands you. The tiger is a nocturnal animal and gives those with the "spirit of the tiger" a special power during the night hours. Your creativity is enhanced during those hours. The tiger is also connected to the new and full moon and the phases of the moon can influence you greatly. You should learn more about the power of the moon and how to use its various phases to the best advantage in your life. As with most cats, the tiger is a sensual creature. It stretches, it muscles are smooth and sleek, it rubs against trees, other cats, and is very sensitive to touch. A tiger spirit person has a great feeling of touch and could learn psychometry very easily. This person also is sensitive to the touch of others and can be very sensual in physical relationships.

The tiger spirit person has an affinity for water and often lives near the water or would like to. The water element is one of psychic ability and emotional elements. You can be overly sensitive and emotional, but if you call upon the power and knowledge of the tiger, you can control your life. The tiger is a free spirit and loves to roam and experience new things. The tiger spirit is adventurous and loves to travel and experience new cultures, learn new philosophies, meet new people and yet can still maintain that "solitary" image and feeling. At the same time, the tiger has very strong ties to its young. The tiger spirit has great motherly devotion and raises and teaches their children all that they can while the children are within their territory.

Tigers hunt silently and slowly and this can be a very beneficial trait to learn in the tiger spirit life. Weigh things carefully, don't be in too much of a hurry, At the time in your life when the tiger spirit speaks, slow down and become deliberate in your choices. If you feel you are being selfish, that is probably for your own good. Everyone must learn to "do for themselves" before they can help others. You may also find yourself interested in various pursuits that have not previously appealed to you. Follow your instincts. The tiger is a great leader.

THE SPIRIT OF THE TIGER IS:
POWER
COURAGE
DEVOTION
PASSION
ADVENTURE
SENSUALITY

It's been said that the white tiger, which occurs in both the Bengal family and the Siberian, is a "spirit tiger", but as of yet I have been unable to find any information via the web, aside from an artist's page, that confirms this or elaborates further. The artist's page however, can be found at (http://www.rusticmooncrafts.com/BIGCATS.html)

There is, however, an article by Robert Wessing that might shed some more light on the origins of this, entitled "The Last Tiger in East Java: Symbolic Continuity in Ecological Change", where he discusses the religion of Islam and the Qur'an book of Samsul Muarif (SS, EIR and SJS 1992, 39). He also explains how tigers are often viewed as manifestations of guardian angels.

Here's a direct quote from the article:

"Many of these beliefs come together in stories centering on a white
tiger named Kopok, who watches over the area of Mt. Gunung Agung
(or Gunung Ringgit) near Situbundo. Some say that this tiger is associated with Kanjeng Raden Candrakusumah, whose grave he guards on Gunung Agung; the Kanjeng's descendants need not fear tigers, it is claimed, because Kopok chases them all off. Others explain that Kopok protects the grave of Syeh Abdurrachman Rama Agung, who pioneered the area.'' Kopok is the Syeh's gift; because of him, thieves are afraid to operate in the area. Every year during the month of Ruwah offerings are made to the guardian tiger;" meat may not be included, however, since this would make the tiger wild."

The Temple of the Tiger at (http://www.freewebs.com/tigerstemple/tigertotems.htm) offers this information about the totem of the white tiger:

Role: Seeker of Personal Truth

Lesson: Power of Conviction

Element: Fire

Wind: South, Recalling the Inner Child

Medicine: Uniqueness

White tiger souls are individuals in every sense of the word and pride themselves upon standing apart from the group. It is this inner drive to be recognized for their unique contributions, that will often propel he/she who walks with white tiger, into positions of public attention and recognition. Consequently, many leaders who have elicited sweeping changes and reformation have had the blessing of the white tiger.

The white tiger reminds us that although we are all one, it is the specialized contribution of the Individual that begins the spark that later becomes the blazing torch that illuminates the night, growing brighter with each individual spirit that contributes their own unique light.

If the white tiger manifests the contrary medicine, then he/she may be the proverbial rebel without a cause, tossing a stone into a calm lake without the intent of a Higher Good being served and merely to watch the ripples spread outward.

Yet when the powerful and highly individualized energies so abundant with this Totem can be harnessed and channeled in a constructive manner, then their gift of uniqueness can spread lasting changes that benefit the whole. The resulting manifestation is as a brilliant star in a night sky beckoning all to partake in the beauty and fire of life.

I'm not sure what all I've gained from my research, perhaps further insight into myself or perhaps confirmation of the things I already knew, but either way it was an interesting read lol.

Posted by spiritiger at 7:32 PM
Updated: Tuesday, 27 October 2009 4:04 PM
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